Comments on: The Pledge http://www.ndvh.org/2009/10/the-pledge/ 1-800-799-SAFE (7233) or TTY 1-800-787-3224 Sun, 14 Mar 2010 01:15:28 -0600 http://wordpress.org/?v=2.8.6 hourly 1 By: Jennifer Bergerson http://www.ndvh.org/2009/10/the-pledge/comment-page-1/#comment-555 Jennifer Bergerson Sat, 20 Feb 2010 08:09:38 +0000 http://www.ndvh.org/?p=1219#comment-555 I feel for you very much! but my first recomendation is to call the local sherrif's dept. and see if there is a battered women's shelter they can escort you too. and stay strong you will over come this too. I feel for you very much! but my first recomendation is to call the local sherrif’s dept. and see if there is a battered women’s shelter they can escort you too. and stay strong you will over come this too.

]]> By: Jennifer Bergerson http://www.ndvh.org/2009/10/the-pledge/comment-page-1/#comment-554 Jennifer Bergerson Sat, 20 Feb 2010 08:01:50 +0000 http://www.ndvh.org/?p=1219#comment-554 What makes it worse is with all this labeling CPS has done they failed to tell the judge one tittle I do carry. That is Texas Non-commisioned security officer I have held that tittle for over 6 years. CPS told me that a mulitple felon was a better parent than an security officer because my job is dangerous. Very few People have had to ever deal with CPS and rarely does anyone have to deal with them more than once, Well they have been in my life since I was born. I am native american, My real mother was an alcoholic and when CPS investigated me they accused me of everything my real mother was accused of, right after My abusive ex filled their minds with all kinds of twisted versions of the truth. I am labeled as an alcoholic when I am allergic to alcohol. Honestly sooner or later this country is going to have to revamp the way they deal with these situations or their will be alot more tragedies happen. What makes it worse is with all this labeling CPS has done they failed to tell the judge one tittle I do carry. That is Texas Non-commisioned security officer I have held that tittle for over 6 years. CPS told me that a mulitple felon was a better parent than an security officer because my job is dangerous.

Very few People have had to ever deal with CPS and rarely does anyone have to deal with them more than once, Well they have been in my life since I was born. I am native american, My real mother was an alcoholic and when CPS investigated me they accused me of everything my real mother was accused of, right after My abusive ex filled their minds with all kinds of twisted versions of the truth. I am labeled as an alcoholic when I am allergic to alcohol.
Honestly sooner or later this country is going to have to revamp the way they deal with these situations or their will be alot more tragedies happen.

]]> By: Jennifer Bergerson http://www.ndvh.org/2009/10/the-pledge/comment-page-1/#comment-553 Jennifer Bergerson Sat, 20 Feb 2010 07:55:08 +0000 http://www.ndvh.org/?p=1219#comment-553 Thank you very much. I have my own self published Poetry book at createspace.com. I am honored that you love the poems, but I am a vessel by which god chose to send his message. I have tried for years to put these out there but some how always held back because of the worlds view on a battered wife. Until one day a friend was at my house and read them She cried after reading " dozen roses" and that is when I started to make the attempt to get them published. god bless you all Psalms 91:11 Jennifer Bergerson Thank you very much. I have my own self published Poetry book at createspace.com. I am honored that you love the poems, but I am a vessel by which god chose to send his message. I have tried for years to put these out there but some how always held back because of the worlds view on a battered wife. Until one day a friend was at my house and read them She cried after reading ” dozen roses” and that is when I started to make the attempt to get them published.

god bless you all
Psalms 91:11
Jennifer Bergerson

]]> By: Betty Adex http://www.ndvh.org/2009/10/the-pledge/comment-page-1/#comment-531 Betty Adex Fri, 05 Feb 2010 07:49:32 +0000 http://www.ndvh.org/?p=1219#comment-531 Yes Emma-Jane, you took all the words right out of my mouth. God bless you two. ,y prayers are with you. Yes Emma-Jane, you took all the words right out of my mouth. God bless you two. ,y prayers are with you.

]]> By: Betty Adex http://www.ndvh.org/2009/10/the-pledge/comment-page-1/#comment-530 Betty Adex Fri, 05 Feb 2010 07:44:54 +0000 http://www.ndvh.org/?p=1219#comment-530 Wow Jennifer, you're such a great writer. May God continue to enrich you and bless each day to become better days for you. I LOVE THIS POEM AND THE SECOND ONE SO MUCH. WOW! YOU NEED THEM PUBLISHED!! Have a blissful weekend. Wow Jennifer, you’re such a great writer. May God continue to enrich you and bless each day to become better days for you.

I LOVE THIS POEM AND THE SECOND ONE SO MUCH. WOW! YOU NEED THEM PUBLISHED!!

Have a blissful weekend.

]]> By: Betty Adex http://www.ndvh.org/2009/10/the-pledge/comment-page-1/#comment-529 Betty Adex Fri, 05 Feb 2010 07:35:44 +0000 http://www.ndvh.org/?p=1219#comment-529 Wendy, I know it is tough but you can achieve anything you put your mind to do. There are resources around you, call your state's DV agencies. Trust me, if you can dream it and have the will to achieve it, you can achieve your goals, become a better person and live a violence free, fulfilled life. You can contact me if you need any assistance. YES YOU CAN WENDY! Wendy,
I know it is tough but you can achieve anything you put your mind to do. There are resources around you, call your state’s DV agencies.
Trust me, if you can dream it and have the will to achieve it, you can achieve your goals, become a better person and live a violence free, fulfilled life.
You can contact me if you need any assistance. YES YOU CAN WENDY!

]]> By: Betty Adex http://www.ndvh.org/2009/10/the-pledge/comment-page-1/#comment-528 Betty Adex Fri, 05 Feb 2010 07:26:27 +0000 http://www.ndvh.org/?p=1219#comment-528 Wowwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww! What an amazing woman you are! May God continue to strengthen you and uphold you. As I read your story, I felt like getting your number and calling you. You're such an exceptional woman. I would love to contact you and will be honored to interview you for one of my monthly series against DV. My email is xceptionalwoman@publicist.com. Thank you and God bless you. You're one of my (S)HEROES! Wowwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww! What an amazing woman you are! May God continue to strengthen you and uphold you. As I read your story, I felt like getting your number and calling you. You’re such an exceptional woman.

I would love to contact you and will be honored to interview you for one of my monthly series against DV. My email is xceptionalwoman@publicist.com.

Thank you and God bless you. You’re one of my (S)HEROES!

]]> By: Emma - Jane http://www.ndvh.org/2009/10/the-pledge/comment-page-1/#comment-496 Emma - Jane Sun, 03 Jan 2010 22:49:53 +0000 http://www.ndvh.org/?p=1219#comment-496 Dear Veronica, I am praying for you. Jesus loves you and your children. Ask God for help Veronica. When there is seemingly no place left to turn, ask God to make a away for you. Ask God to carry you through this nightmare and protect your precious son's mind. Please make contact with a local Church you can feel comfortable at. I truly wish you all the best, God Bless You. p.s. I am in England and have a 2 year old daughter. p.p.s. keep searching on the internet you will find support. And I feel strongly that legal help will be made available, in some form by a Christian. I have prayed for you and that is what I feel in my heart. Keep praying for protection and Justice, God loves you Veronica Davila! Dear Veronica,
I am praying for you. Jesus loves you and your children. Ask God for help Veronica. When there is seemingly no place left to turn, ask God to make a away for you. Ask God to carry you through this nightmare and protect your precious son’s mind.
Please make contact with a local Church you can feel comfortable at. I truly wish you all the best, God Bless You.
p.s. I am in England and have a 2 year old daughter.
p.p.s. keep searching on the internet you will find support. And I feel strongly that legal help will be made available, in some form by a Christian. I have prayed for you and that is what I feel in my heart.
Keep praying for protection and Justice, God loves you Veronica Davila!

]]> By: Veronica Davila http://www.ndvh.org/2009/10/the-pledge/comment-page-1/#comment-494 Veronica Davila Fri, 01 Jan 2010 03:48:14 +0000 http://www.ndvh.org/?p=1219#comment-494 I agree as victims we are not only victimized by our spouces but also by the system, its not right. It's almost like a lot of the times in our situations the sysytem doesnt see the truth until long after he has seriously harmed us or killed us even. I agree as victims we are not only victimized by our spouces but also by the system, its not right. It’s almost like a lot of the times in our situations the sysytem doesnt see the truth until long after he has seriously harmed us or killed us even.

]]> By: Veronica Davila http://www.ndvh.org/2009/10/the-pledge/comment-page-1/#comment-488 Veronica Davila Tue, 29 Dec 2009 10:43:57 +0000 http://www.ndvh.org/?p=1219#comment-488 When I was 16 I met a 21 year old man in an aol chat room. He befriended me and we developed an online friendship which soon led to sexually explicit conversations. After a few months of constant online chatting we began a verbal long distance relationship that lasted up until I was 18 years old. During the coarse of the few short years he had persieved himself as somewhat of a savior. He said all the right words and did everything possible to make me feel loved and cared for and it worked. As a nieve 16 year old, he played on my every emotion and manipulated my every thought. After 2 1/2 years of promising to save me from what he called a troubled home life he eventually convinced me to move to his hometown with him and begin a life together as his wife. Sadly at 18 and im complete love, I fell for it and packed my belongings and moved to his hometown with him. all the while following his every instructions of not involving my family in this decision and not saying a word about our plans for me to pick up and leave after graduation. So I kept my mouth shut and after graduation I packed up and took of without saying a word to anyone. Two days after arriving to my new home is when I soon met the demon hidden within all those " I loves you's and promises". This is when I discovered that I had made a horrible horrible mistake that I would live out to this very day. The second day into my new life with my " boyfriend " of 21/2 years was the day that a man would ever strike me. And it didn' end there the abuse continued day after day week after week. It started off as physical abuse and morphed into emotional and then mental and then a nasty violent combination of all three. He had successfully alienated me from my frinds and family. He has turned my family against me and the worst of all he had secluded me in a city where I knew no one and had no choice but to rely on him. He constantly reminded me of how my family didn'nt care and how they didnt want anything to do with me and how he was now all I had. How he was the only one that cared and i I ever left I would have no where to go and no one to rely one, how I would be all alone in the world. After months of having this message washed into my brain I soon began to believe it. So when he told me he wanted a baby I agreed because after all I felt I had no choice but to comply. At this point I was so stricken with the fear of being alone and homeless that it seemed easier to give him what he wanted and figure out a way to cope late. Three months into our life together I became pregnant and soon realized that I was now really trapped. Suddenly being alone and homeless didnt seem like a bad idea. The abuse at this point became more frequent and more intense. I wasn't allowed to work, I wasn't allowed to have money in my possession. I couldn't leave the house unattended and there was absolutely no way I was allowed to be in contact with anyone other than his family. Very rarely was I able to contact my family and what little friends I had left. I wsn't even allowed to visit with my family unless he consented to it which wasnt very often. After many attempts to escape my life with him He always managed tp persuade me to come back. After of course he would drive a wedge between me and my family and turn us against each other. In around March of 2006 I finally got up the nerve to call the police and report the abuse. I filed a report and agreed to file charges against him for assaulting me during a heated arguement which took place in front of my 9 month old son. At this point I arranged for a ride back to my hometown and my son and I left that very night. And as always he begged and pleaded for us to come back home. He said all of his usual im sorrys and I love yous and even agreed to seek help for his anger and after a few weeks I gave in and went back. To only be forced into dropping the assault charges and reaquainted with the usual daily dose of insults and violence. So I went into what I now realize was servival mode. I played into his usual mind games and demands and waited for the perfect oppourtunity to run for the door and never look back. A few months later that oppourtunity arose in the form of a family gathering for my little brothers babyshower. I faught and argued with him to allow me to attend and after and week of pleadeing and walking on egg shells he finally consented but with strings attached. I would be allowed to participate unattended for days. He would pack mine and the baby's bags , carefully packing just enough clothes and formula for three days, and he would call me at my mothers house at random times to ensure that I was only there and no where else and when the three days were up he would be there to bring our son and I back home. I however had other plans. I agreed to his terms and held my breath while I walked out that house for the very last time. Bags in my hands and baby on my hip I held my breath with my heart racing and sweat beading down my face, I left my peered in the reerview mirror the whole drive back to my hometown,a place I hadn't seen in two years. after arriving into the safety of a full house of close family and friends I took a deep breath and cried tears of relief and joy. For the first time in a long time I felt safe, I felt free and most of all I felt hope. That hope and freedom would soon come to an end the moment my boyfriend and abuser would learn of my plans to not go back to Dallas. That was 3 years ago and since then we have gone through a rigerious year of a nasty and expensive custody battle which he manipulated, threatened and paided his way right to the top. After running out of financial resources and the funds to continue a interstate custody battle, I finally gave in once again to his demands. After being drug through the mud and bashed by not only my ex boyfriend but by his attourney as well, he made it very clear that I once again had no choice but to comply with his demands. After all our custody battled which had began in the best interest of the child and ended i the best interest of who had the most money, was no longer a battle I could continue to fight. I was out of money and financial resources, the stress of the non stop financial burden and stress had created a rift between my family and I. We were tapped out and stressed out to the max, I felt no other choice but to throw in the white towel and put a stop to this nightmare before things got any worse. I withdrew my claim and agreed to the terms of a court order his lawyer drew up and prayed for the best. Neatless to say after 3 1//2 years of seperation my ex boyfriend still finds a way to abuse my not only mentally and emotionally but physically as well. He constantly threatens to take my son away from me and has even opted to brainwashing my son into not wanting to be with me. He tells me that my three year old hates me and that I'm a no good mother and my son is better off living with him in another city. I have since then moved on and am currently engaged and have just given birth to my seconf son but no matter how hard I try to move on and regain ahol of my life I can't. My ex boyfriend still finds a way to control me through our three year old. I can't deal with the constant threats and the pain of hearing my ex tell my son to hate me. I can't deal with the constant and continued abuse. He since then as become more careful about what he does how he does it. He knows now hoe not to get caught and the abuse is getting worse and worse with everyday that goes by. He has even taken my son from me and is refusing to allow me access and contact with my toddler. The police wont interfere until he has assaulted me on 2 differnt occasions within a 6 month period, I have had no luck seeking out free legal help and I can't afford the financial strain of another interstate custody battle. I can no longer deal with the abuse, I don't know what to do. I have been failed not only by my family which have since distanced themselves from me, but by the courts and the police department. How much further does this have to continue until he faces the consequences of his actions? How much further does the violence and abuse have to escalate before someone steps in and puts a stop to it. How much more does he have to hurt me and my son ( mentally) before I either lose completely or some how gain control of the situation and but i to a long over due end. I need help, please can some one help me? I fear that either this is going to continue until he has either killed mer or seriously injured me or he is just going to up and leave to his native country of Mexico with my son and never return. Either way I will never see my precious first born again. If there is anyone out there that can help in even the smallest way PLEASE I beg you please help. Iknw nothing else to do. I don't know where to even begin anymore. I just know that I have two beautiful little boys that need their mother and if this goes any further they might not have that. When I was 16 I met a 21 year old man in an aol chat room. He befriended me and we developed an online friendship which soon led to sexually explicit conversations. After a few months of constant online chatting we began a verbal long distance relationship that lasted up until I was 18 years old. During the coarse of the few short years he had persieved himself as somewhat of a savior. He said all the right words and did everything possible to make me feel loved and cared for and it worked. As a nieve 16 year old, he played on my every emotion and manipulated my every thought. After 2 1/2 years of promising to save me from what he called a troubled home life he eventually convinced me to move to his hometown with him and begin a life together as his wife. Sadly at 18 and im complete love, I fell for it and packed my belongings and moved to his hometown with him. all the while following his every instructions of not involving my family in this decision and not saying a word about our plans for me to pick up and leave after graduation. So I kept my mouth shut and after graduation I packed up and took of without saying a word to anyone. Two days after arriving to my new home is when I soon met the demon hidden within all those ” I loves you’s and promises”. This is when I discovered that I had made a horrible horrible mistake that I would live out to this very day. The second day into my new life with my ” boyfriend ” of 21/2 years was the day that a man would ever strike me. And it didn’ end there the abuse continued day after day week after week. It started off as physical abuse and morphed into emotional and then mental and then a nasty violent combination of all three. He had successfully alienated me from my frinds and family. He has turned my family against me and the worst of all he had secluded me in a city where I knew no one and had no choice but to rely on him. He constantly reminded me of how my family didn’nt care and how they didnt want anything to do with me and how he was now all I had. How he was the only one that cared and i I ever left I would have no where to go and no one to rely one, how I would be all alone in the world. After months of having this message washed into my brain I soon began to believe it. So when he told me he wanted a baby I agreed because after all I felt I had no choice but to comply. At this point I was so stricken with the fear of being alone and homeless that it seemed easier to give him what he wanted and figure out a way to cope late. Three months into our life together I became pregnant and soon realized that I was now really trapped. Suddenly being alone and homeless didnt seem like a bad idea. The abuse at this point became more frequent and more intense. I wasn’t allowed to work, I wasn’t allowed to have money in my possession. I couldn’t leave the house unattended and there was absolutely no way I was allowed to be in contact with anyone other than his family. Very rarely was I able to contact my family and what little friends I had left. I wsn’t even allowed to visit with my family unless he consented to it which wasnt very often. After many attempts to escape my life with him He always managed tp persuade me to come back. After of course he would drive a wedge between me and my family and turn us against each other. In around March of 2006 I finally got up the nerve to call the police and report the abuse. I filed a report and agreed to file charges against him for assaulting me during a heated arguement which took place in front of my 9 month old son. At this point I arranged for a ride back to my hometown and my son and I left that very night. And as always he begged and pleaded for us to come back home. He said all of his usual im sorrys and I love yous and even agreed to seek help for his anger and after a few weeks I gave in and went back. To only be forced into dropping the assault charges and reaquainted with the usual daily dose of insults and violence. So I went into what I now realize was servival mode. I played into his usual mind games and demands and waited for the perfect oppourtunity to run for the door and never look back. A few months later that oppourtunity arose in the form of a family gathering for my little brothers babyshower. I faught and argued with him to allow me to attend and after and week of pleadeing and walking on egg shells he finally consented but with strings attached. I would be allowed to participate unattended for days. He would pack mine and the baby’s bags , carefully packing just enough clothes and formula for three days, and he would call me at my mothers house at random times to ensure that I was only there and no where else and when the three days were up he would be there to bring our son and I back home. I however had other plans. I agreed to his terms and held my breath while I walked out that house for the very last time. Bags in my hands and baby on my hip I held my breath with my heart racing and sweat beading down my face, I left my peered in the reerview mirror the whole drive back to my hometown,a place I hadn’t seen in two years. after arriving into the safety of a full house of close family and friends I took a deep breath and cried tears of relief and joy. For the first time in a long time I felt safe, I felt free and most of all I felt hope. That hope and freedom would soon come to an end the moment my boyfriend and abuser would learn of my plans to not go back to Dallas. That was 3 years ago and since then we have gone through a rigerious year of a nasty and expensive custody battle which he manipulated, threatened and paided his way right to the top. After running out of financial resources and the funds to continue a interstate custody battle, I finally gave in once again to his demands. After being drug through the mud and bashed by not only my ex boyfriend but by his attourney as well, he made it very clear that I once again had no choice but to comply with his demands. After all our custody battled which had began in the best interest of the child and ended i the best interest of who had the most money, was no longer a battle I could continue to fight. I was out of money and financial resources, the stress of the non stop financial burden and stress had created a rift between my family and I. We were tapped out and stressed out to the max, I felt no other choice but to throw in the white towel and put a stop to this nightmare before things got any worse. I withdrew my claim and agreed to the terms of a court order his lawyer drew up and prayed for the best. Neatless to say after 3 1//2 years of seperation my ex boyfriend still finds a way to abuse my not only mentally and emotionally but physically as well. He constantly threatens to take my son away from me and has even opted to brainwashing my son into not wanting to be with me. He tells me that my three year old hates me and that I’m a no good mother and my son is better off living with him in another city. I have since then moved on and am currently engaged and have just given birth to my seconf son but no matter how hard I try to move on and regain ahol of my life I can’t. My ex boyfriend still finds a way to control me through our three year old. I can’t deal with the constant threats and the pain of hearing my ex tell my son to hate me. I can’t deal with the constant and continued abuse. He since then as become more careful about what he does how he does it. He knows now hoe not to get caught and the abuse is getting worse and worse with everyday that goes by. He has even taken my son from me and is refusing to allow me access and contact with my toddler. The police wont interfere until he has assaulted me on 2 differnt occasions within a 6 month period, I have had no luck seeking out free legal help and I can’t afford the financial strain of another interstate custody battle. I can no longer deal with the abuse, I don’t know what to do. I have been failed not only by my family which have since distanced themselves from me, but by the courts and the police department. How much further does this have to continue until he faces the consequences of his actions? How much further does the violence and abuse have to escalate before someone steps in and puts a stop to it. How much more does he have to hurt me and my son ( mentally) before I either lose completely or some how gain control of the situation and but i to a long over due end. I need help, please can some one help me? I fear that either this is going to continue until he has either killed mer or seriously injured me or he is just going to up and leave to his native country of Mexico with my son and never return. Either way I will never see my precious first born again. If there is anyone out there that can help in even the smallest way PLEASE I beg you please help. Iknw nothing else to do. I don’t know where to even begin anymore. I just know that I have two beautiful little boys that need their mother and if this goes any further they might not have that.

]]>